The years 2007-2009 were a pain in my ass. So much happened in such a short time period it's hard to fathom. It's worth a look and quickest (and nicest) recap possible. I learned a lot of band's set lists and I learned a lot about the music business.
Vital Remains contacted me via Myspace interested in having me join as lead guitarist. They called me shortly before entering the studio to record "Icons of Evil". Tentative plans were made and canceled, on their part (I was very disappointed). A year later they called again and asked if I could get on a plane and join the tour in progress. I declined. It felt good doing that.
That said, I hope to see them healthy and back on the road asap.
During this period I was on the razor's edge of joining Mayhem (as mentioned in previous blog). At the same time ex- Vital Remains vocalist, Jeff Gruslin, hired me to pretty much write and record an entire Godless Rising album 'Trumpet of Triumph' for Moribund Records. Metalbolic Records released the Onward demos for "The Neverending Sun" and vocalist Michael Grant (R.I.P) and I agreed that eventually, Onward will return.
Timelines blur at this point. Sweden's Darkane hired me as a fill in guitarist for the second half of their North American tour supporting Soilwork. The initial gigs and getting to see Canada was great. I hated them, they hated me (not totally true but I'm rushing this stupid blog) and after a bottle of Jack Daniels and a whole lotta Canadian weed I mistook the tour bus living space for a urinal and let it fly. Nuclear Blast Records flew me back home quickly after the incident. It was a shame as German label 'Rock it Up Records' had just released my third solo album and it was selling really well thanks to the fact that I was getting "out there" again. My behavior was really, really bad. Opportunities were getting flushed left and right (no pun intended). That being said, fuck Darkane.
Back home I sent drunk blogs out nightly on Myspace and woke up to angry emails from Nuclear Blast Records as several rock news websites shared my asinine blogs with the world. A friend of mine within the business told me I was pretty much "blacklisted" in the elite Century Media/Nuclear Blast circle of musicians. Yes, the phone did stop ringing. Boo hoo. Those elites aren't so elite anymore.
No regrets. If the damn phone would have not rang so much in the first place, I wouldn't of had to go through all this bullshit. Like many guitarists before me, I mastered the art of self sabotage. On the homefront, my mother was battling early onset Alzheimers disease and dementia. My wife to be was suffering with health issues. My personal life was a mess. Nothing was going right.
Luckily, Due to my work with Godless Rising in this time period, Moribund Records signed all my projects and they continue to release my albums to this day. THIS IS ALL I EVER WANTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Finally, I put the music away for awhile and learned a new skill set. I no longer had to rely on music as a living and the comfort of this realization inspired my most musically productive time- which continues to this day.
I gotta go- Toby
